The Cracker Apocolypse!

July 11, 2009 - Photo by Stephen Morton/Getty Images North America

Aargh! It's Friday the Thirteenth! Only Three Years ,one month and Eight days till the Mayan Calendar runs out! The Gayz are trying to marry up! The president is a black guy! Hurry! Stock up on ammo, Glenn Beck books, Twinkies and Skoal! There are wars an rumors of wars! Be afraid! Be afraid! It's the Cracker Apocolypse! Aieeeeeee!